Love And Relationships

Relationships are said to be the source of our greatest pleasure and our greatest pain.
Unfortunately the pleasure can be all too short-lived and the pain can go on and on. The main reason for this is that we are completely ignorant – ignorant of our own needs, of our partner’s needs and of what constitutes an ideal partner or a great relationship?

In today’s complex and fast paced society we have high expectations, yet no great relationship role models or education to help us. The standard of help and relationship wisdom is reflected in the devastatingly high divorce rates (46%). The fact that we don’t learn by our mistakes is underlined by the fact that second and third marriages fail at even higher rates (65% and 75%). The majority that co-habit or stay unhappily married are in the main tolerating low levels of love and connection.

How’s your intimate relationship strategy working for you?

With very poor education available on intimacy, communication & relationships and few role models who can share their secrets with us, it is hardly surprising that so many people’s relationships do not live up to expectations.

It does not have to be this way. A great education on relationships is possible, supported by coaching and mentoring by Andy and Diane.

The dating and relationship problems usually start for three reasons:

1. Patterns of relationship behaviour that we have learned
   
2. Emotional baggage from our previous relationships, or limiting beliefs about ourselves if we have been largely single
3. A poor selection strategy – ranging from desperation, to thinking we won’t find anyone better, to not knowing at all what we really want (or need) in a partner

Which of these scenarios have you played out?

As a result, we often ‘end up’ in relationships, rather than plan them and we start out grateful or flattered… not too objective. We generally put on a huge mask when dating as we put our best foot forward, frequently creating an illusion of who we are (who we’d like to be perceived as).

THE IMPORTANCE OF RELATIONSHIP EDUCATION

Andy and Di have invested in extensive specialist training in relationships and have experience of working with hundreds of singles and couples. We have also experienced getting relationships wrong in our own lives (we both have failed marriages) and then putting all our new relationship education into practise – with hugely different and better results. We have a firm belief that to serve you well and give you the best value in transforming your relationship experience, we first need to share with you an awareness and education on relationships. Once you start to become aware of what typically goes wrong in relationships… and understand why, then you can honestly relate to your own situation, patterns and past experiences. From here, with an awareness of new possibilities, you can have the belief that it CAN all be different. These are the first three stages of our AUTHENTIC transformation process. From here, coaching can be quick and effective.

Think about these three scenarios:

1. You’ve enjoyed a long and expensive education, at school, maybe university and then with specialist vocational, technical and/or managerial training. This leaves you feeling well equipped and confident to deal with any situation that may arise at work? If there is something new or tricky to deal with, you most likely have a colleague, a manager or a specialist whom you can refer to.
2. Or maybe you have risen through the ranks without training, using entrepreneurial flair and are used to getting your way and enjoying success, with all the hard work paying off.
3. Perhaps you feel a little unsupported at work, a little exposed and could do with more training, mentoring and support.

Now whichever category you fall under, imagine how you feel when you arrive home. You have no education on relationships, no mentors or role models. The power that you exercise at work, in your business, evaporates or meets with resistance and confrontation at home. The stress [3] at work is compounded by stress at home too – they can become overwhelming.

Here is a true story about a successful businessman – he had his own very successful pharmaceutical business. He was very well educated with over 15 years training, including two PhDs. There was nothing at work that could ‘phase’ him. When he rolled up at work in his Aston Martin Vanquish and put his key in the door – he confidently knew that there was nothing that he could not handle. However, on returning home, as he put the key in the front door of his house, he had no idea how to handle the noisy, demanding, chaotic scenes of his stressed, unhappy and demanding wife and kids. Nothing he tried seemed to make them happy. We asked him how many years of training he had invested in to master his relationship & home environment – he looked shocked! The answer, unsurprisingly, was none.

For more information on ‘Cosmic’ Attraction, browse the posts on this blog and also go to our web site http://www.cosmic-attraction.com

For more information on enjoying Success in Love and Relationships, browse the posts on this blog and also go to our web site: http://www.executive-relationship-coaching.co.uk